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Self

by Langdon on August 8, 2009

The sense of self is truly my greatest impediment to productivity and tranquility. The days I am the emptiest, the least present to record my deeds and trials, the most I get done, the happiest the doing. Yet a nugget of self awareness must remain, otherwise, of course, I would not be aware to take satisfaction in the process.

Like shouting in a large room and hearing the echo, so must there be a modicum of reflection, of recursion, of an event. Is that what 'events' truly are, the reflection of some motion, some flux, by an environment? Is consciousness simply the reflection of neurochemical events by other neurochemical events? Do humans seem to have more consciousness than other animals because the network of our brains are denser and more able to reflect back and propogate those events? Or maybe their complexity means that there are more reflections of those events... Consciousness becomes then a matter of iteration, not quality.

An 'event' must therefore include both the action and the response. This is sounding dangerously like the tree falling in the woods, but it's so obviously so very nearly so. We can't exist as conscious individuals without the constant echo of our thoughts. So what would we be without that reflection? Samadhi then is the stilling of the reflection of thought, the closing of doors upon the echoing labyrinth of consciousness.

And yet, the result is not unconsciousness. If we truly exist as the reflection of events within our neurology, quieting that neurology will let us, as part of our environment, reflect everything BUT us- In a word, the Universe.

Yeah, that makes sense.

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